Leisure Activities
by comptine
Summary: AU Toph and Sokka, two complete strangers, find themselves staying at the same hotel, both dealing with the ends of serious relationships, and consequently with a lot of free time on their hands. Collab between Twilight Rose2 and Kyoshi7989 -Hiatus-
1. Chapter 1

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**_-Kyoshi7989-  
_**

**_Leisure Activities_**

**_Chapter 1_**

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Whenever Toph Bei Fong broke up with a boyfriend, there was a certain formula to it. Lots and lots of chocolate, for one thing. Intently listening to very, very violent movie (preferably about zombies) and imagining that her ex was the guy getting his head torn off—with a satisfying ripping song—and screaming like the pansy-ass he really was.

And, of course, a ridiculous amount of breakup songs. And listening to them. Over. And over. And over. And over. And over.

Especially Avril Lavigne. Yes. She, Toph had to admit, was very good for breakup songs. Mainly the oh-my-god-you-suck kind.

But there were some that were simply perfect for Haru. Haru and his stupid dumb freaking mustache.

_Don't turn around_

_I'm sick and I'm tired of your face_

_Don't make this worse_

_You've already gone and got me mad_

_It's too bad I'm not sad_

_It's casting over_

_It's just one of those things_

_You'll have to get over it_

Toph sang along with the Avril, scowling at the memories of her ex that continuously flooded her mind. Stupid Haru. Stupid mustache. If she'd had the chance, she would have shaved it off before she left…Toph reached over from the bed and turned the stereo up even louder, practically screaming along with the lyrics.

"You brought your stereo with you justso you could listen to breakup songs?" Zuko's exasperated voice came from the other side of the room. She'd nearly forgotten he was there. Even when she'd moved in with Haru, they'd each had their own rooms. That didn't mean that Toph didn't occasionally make late-night excursions to his bed, but she just wasn't the type for cuddling.

It was strange sharing a room with anyone, least of all one this big. The hotel spoiled it's guests, but she supposed that from the bill her parents had read out to her, most were already. Five star hotels don't come cheap, as Toph had discovered. Fortunately, though, her parents had been glad to lend her some of the Bei Fong fortune for a trip to Florida...they'd never liked Haru much, anyway. Zuko, one of her oldest friends, had come along for "emotional support." Or, at least, that's what she'd told him.

In reality, Toph was just waiting for the perfect chance to push him head-first into the pool. "I'm sorry, Princess," she snorted, and turned the music up just a bit louder, "I didn't realize you had such sensitive ears."

"I don't," he said shortly. There was a pause, as Zuko stepped over to turn the stereo down a few notches. "Toph," he began softly, "I understand that you're broken up over Haru, but—"

"Hey, Princess," the ex in question said loudly, "Stop turning my entire life into an old rerun of Doctor Phil."

Zuko sighed, as Toph fell back on the bed. "Are you ever going to listen to me?"

Her lips quirked up in a sort of half-smile. "Nope."

He threw his hands up in the air. "Should've known."

"Yes," she agreed, "You should've."

There was a long pause.

"Race you to the 24/7 ice cream bar. First one there gets the under-the-pillow chocolates—all of them."

"You're on."

* * *

Sokka Kuruk, too, had a special way of dealing with breakups. Like Toph, chocolate was a must, as well as many, many movies—albeit a different genre. A different genre meaning…well…

Soap operas. Such as Grey's Anatomy. Even a few old episodes of General Hospitalwere acceptable. And no one good deny the distracting powers of a few good old run-throughs of Heroes and 24.

Also similar to Toph, Sokka's breakup period included many, many breakup songs. Only…mushier.

Mika's Happy Ending was a good example.

And, frankly, Katara was getting sick of Sokka's crooning along with Mika, as she sang a heart-breaking:

_This is the hardest story that I've ever told_

_No hope, or love, or glory_

_Happy endings gone forever more_

_I feel as if I feel as if I'm wastin'_

_And I'm wastin' everyday_

Her eye twitched as Sokka caterwauled on:

_This is the way you left me,_

_I'm not pretending._

_No hope, no love, no glory,_

_No Happy Ending._

_This is the way that we love,_

_Like it's forever._

_Then live the rest of our life,_

_But not together._

"Sokka," Katara said at last, as her ears bled from her brother's horrible singing. To her horror, he ignored her, and sang onward.

"Sokka."

Still, he sang, as she counted down from ten and attempted to quell the overwhelming desire to stab her older brother will a dull spoon (repeatedly, and in the throat).

"SOKKA!"

At last, her brother glanced over at her. "But Katara," he said reproachfully, "My musical genius is stimulated by grieving—"

"Sokka." She leaned across the bed. "You are not grieving. You are making my ears bleed." Katara clutched at the poor, abused appendages in question, while glaring at her brother. "Stop. It. Now."

"Err." He backed away from her apprehensively as she glared viciously, daring him to refuse. "I could…grieve over…coffee?" Sokka suggested weakly.

Katara cooled down. "Yes," she agreed, smiling a bit. "Coffee is good."

He returned her smile, albeit anxiously. "Great! Let's go!" Sokka exclaimed nervously, edging away from Katara subtly—and rightly so.

His sister could be damn scary.

* * *

"I won."

"But I've been here for thirty seconds already, Toph!"

"Doesn't matter," she snorted, taking a lick from her piled-high ice-cream cone, "I won anyway."

"But—that makes no sense!" Zuko clutched at his hair. "You can't just declare 'I won'—!"

"Well, you can't, but Ican," Toph shrugged, slipping into a seat. "Sorry, Princess. You just don't have what it takes."

For the fifteenth time that day, Zuko sighed, and decided this would be a good time to bring up The Ex. "Are you sure you don't wanna talk about Haru with me? Because I'm always—"

"I think," Toph interrupted, "That I need more ice cream. What about you?" Without waiting for an answer, she leapt up from the table, and stalked back to the ice cream machine. Piling on the chocolate sauce, she strode back to the table, was prepared to make another scathing comment about Zuko and his fetish with reenacting every Oprah episode ever to air, when—

"Oh. My. Freaking. God." Toph's blank eyes opened wide in disbelief, as her ice cream fell to her floor. Clutching her coffee-soaked shirt, she fumbled for a hold on her soon-to-be-victim, and her fingers closed around a collar, not without great satisfaction. "You," she accused, "Spilled coffee all over me."

The victim gulped. "You know," he—it was a he, Toph realized now—began desperately, "You have beautiful eyes—"

"Oh, yeah," Toph cut Sokka off, voice dripping with sarcasm. "That means so much, since I'm blind and all."

"Oh."

There was an awkward pause, before Sokka attempted a weak, "You're voice is music to my ears…?"

"Don't bother," she sniffed, holding out her hand.

He stared at it. "Um…."

"Give me your shirt, dumbass!" Toph blurted out at last. "I can't wear this all day!" She indicated her soaked outfit, as all woman in the room over 50 stared at the pair, scandalized.

"Right," Sokka sighed. After a long moment, he asked nervously, "Err…should we really be doing this…here?"

Toph sighed loudly, and muttered something about "pesky little virgins." "Come on," she ordered, abruptly turning and striding towards the changing area by the pool. Leading him into the woman's dressing room—Sokka squeaked nervously, imaging what Katara would do if she ever found out about this (though unbeknownst to him, Katara was currently locked in an animated conversation with Zuko)—Toph paused in front of a bathroom stall. "Shirt. Now."

Sokka slipped out of his favorite T-shirt somewhat mournfully, and watched as Toph stepped into the stall, threw off her own coffee-soaked shirt, and tossed it into the trashcan as she stepped back out. Now that she was clad in the tight-fitting muscle shirt that Sokka had been wearing only a few seconds before, Sokka could clearly recognize some of her…assets.

To say the least, she obviously wasn't as young as he'd pictured her to be.

"What are you staring at, huh?" she snapped, as Sokka wondered how the hell she'd known that. His eyes followed her as she marched out of the bathroom, shooting a flat, "Buzz off," back at him as she stepped into the bright sunlight.

If Katara was scary, she was terrifying.

But he couldn't deny that there was just something about her…

No, he reprimanded himself. Not after you've just broken up with Suki. Not to mention the fact that I don't even know her name…he realized suddenly.

Sokka chuckled to himself. Terrifying? Beautiful? Kick-ass macho?

He'd just found his ticket out of Single Town.

* * *

A/N

ahahahah! Guess who's doing a collab with Kyoshi7989!

It's me!!

Umm...YAY!

goes off to write her chapter


	2. Chapter 2

**-Twilight Rose2-**

**Leisure Activities**

**Chapter 2**

**-**

"You took his shirt?" Zuko asked as Toph marched him back to their room. He had done nothing, but whenever Toph was in a temper he always seemed to be at the receiving end. And to think he had actually had a conversation will a half-decent looking girl before his best friend had decided that her life was more important than his and dragged him away.

"I have never, ever, met someone so…infuriating! He didn't even say he was sorry! How can he be so…so…" She continued to rant, pulling the door with such force when it flew open the handle dented the plaster wall.

"Infuriating?" Her friend offered, making sure to gently close the door behind them.

"Yes!" She started pacing. Zuko sat down on a bed watching Toph with a small smirk.

"You like him," he said, he knew how to press her buttons, it also happened to be one of his favourite activities. "Don't you?"

"Pro tip." She threw a pillow from the couch at him. It hit his face right on but did nothing to whip the smirk off his face, "Shut it. I'm going to the beach." She stomped around the room, grabbing towels, music, and a bathing suit, and tossing them into a bag. The whole time Zuko held his laughter in, but when the door swung shut he let out a small chuckle. Toph was one person he loved messing with.

* * *

Katara, on the other hand, did not hold in her laughter. She laughed at her brother the whole time they walked to their room. Sokka took it in stride, pretending that he had no idea why she was laughing. "Ha--ha--ha and then--haha--you should've--hahaha--seen your face--haha--priceless!"

"Laugh it up Katara...laugh it up." He muttered, pulling the door open. Katara followed him in, her giggles dying as she took a seat on the small couch. "So what was her name?"

He stared at her. "Name? I don't know...she kinda just took my shirt and walked away. It wasn't exactly a touching 'Hey let's be friends forever' moment. I'm going to the beach, want to come?"

"Nah, I think I'm going to look around some more. This resort is huge!"

He looked downcast but accepted that he was going to be a loner and started packing up his things before heading out to the beach.

* * *

"Miss. Miss?" Toph pulled her headphones out of her ear and turned to scowl at the man disrupting her vacation time. She was enjoying the ocean sun, still listening to break-up songs, blocking out the world leaving her free to think of more ways that she's going to punish Haru. Her favourite so far was ripping that smug mustache right off his face and then taping it to...well, the thing he loved second to his mustache.

He was a worker at the resort and looked frightened as Toph's eyes stared blankly at him and her voice demanded, "What?!"

"The hotel employees have been asked to find guests willing to participate in the Triple Crown Beach Challenge." As the expression on her face hardened he sped up, swallowing nervously. "And to mention that the prize for the wining team is 1000 dollars!" he added quickly, resisting the urge to run away--and fast too--in order to protect the increasingly endangered Family Jewels.

Toph grinned. If she won, she wouldn't owe her parents as much. "Why not? Show me the way." He nodded and started towards the main beach, Toph following behind, her towel and iPod wrapped up in her arm.

"The sign up is just over there." The worker said, pointing to a small table where a man was sitting, writing names down on clipboards. About six people were lined up, all in bathing suits, talking happily as they waited to be served.

Toph blinked at him. "Are you retarded?"

"W-what?" The man was shaking, not from rage but from pure fear.

"I, as you can clearly see, am blind. Therefore you will walk me to the sign up." She held out her arm. He just looked at it, still at a loss for words. "Well?" She wiggled her arm. She tried to hide her smile. Toph loved making other people feel guilty--it made her feel moderately better about her own fucked up life. He whimpered and took her arm, leading her directly to the table.

"Anything else?" He asked quietly, praying that she said no.

"No, you may leave." Toph said haughtily. The boy scuttled away as Toph stood in life, staring straight ahead, thinking about what she could do with all her winnings.

"Hey you!" Someone yelled on the beach. Toph didn't turn around, she wasn't here with anyone but Zuko so no one would be calling her. "Hey you! Coffee girl!"

Someone started shaking her shoulder. She reached out with an arm, flicking the person right in the chest. He let out a small moan. "Who're you calling coffee girl?" She asked, glaring at the shoulder shaker.

"Because, I poured coffee all over you and I don't know your name."

"For future reference, it's Toph."

"Mine's Sokka, please to meet you."

She faced him, he was smiling and she poked him right in the chest. "Leave. Me. Alone."

He heeded her advice. The two people in front of them had finished their registration leaving Toph to step forward. The man sitting at the table pushed the glasses up his sweaty nose and said in a bored tone, "Names, and status."

"Toph Beifong. Status?"

"Married or dating," he explained, not looking at Toph.

"Single."

He let out a low laugh. "Like I haven't heard that one before." He jabbed his pencil in the direction of a large banner hanging over the table. "Couples only."

"Oh Toph! There you are!" Sokka said, wrapping an arm around her shoulder and stopping her protest short he continued, "Toph Beifong and Sokka Kirima. Dating."

"Great." He passed them two bracelets. "Here's your identification, the contest starts in five minutes near the Beach Bar. NEXT!"

Sokka pulled Toph over to the side. Once they were out of earshot of the sweaty registration man she punched him in the arm. "What was that for?!"

"I cannot believe you!" She yelled at him, her fists clenched, ready to punch him again, as she continued to scream, "First you spill coffee on my, and ruin my favourite shirt. Then you sign me up for a contest I didn't even want to enter!"

"Then why were you standing in line?" He challenged, scowling at her. It wasn't his fault he didn't have a partner to compete with. He needed the money and he was planing on getting it. If that happened to involve a random girl he only met yesterday, he didn't care, who knows, maybe he'd get lucky and score a few dates.

After, of course, she forgave him. If that ever happened.

"Because, I thought I could make an easy thousand bucks. The minute he said 'couples only' I was outta there, until SOMEONE came along and messed up my holiday!"

"Listen, what happens if we win?"

"We won't win because I am going back right now and telling him to take me off the list." She started walking away.

Sokka's brain started grinding. The answer came to him right away. He crossed his arms and called to her, "I'll split 60/40."

This stopped Toph. "80/20."

"60/40."

"70/30, and I'll throw in a free dinner."

"All the dinners are free, this is an all inclusive."

"Take or leave it."

"Deal."

"Well," she held out her hand. "Now, let's win this competition."

"Welcome to the first round of the Triple Crown Beach Competition!" The announcer said, the small crowd that was gathered cheered. "Now let me introduce you to our couples! Jet and Azula, Aang and Ty Lee, Sokka and Toph, and finally Smellerbee and Longshot!" As he said the names, the couples walked onto the stage.

"I can't believe I'm doing this..." Toph muttered to Sokka. He didn't know whether to laugh or to agree, so he stayed silent.

"The first competition is a sand building contest. The team with the most impressive design will win the first round! This year's theme is: Monsters of the deep. You have until sunset. GO!"

There was a storm of sand as the four couples ran onto the sand. "What are we going to go?" She asked Sokka once they had found their designated sand building area.

"A kraken!" He said rubbing his palm together.

"What's that?"

"Never mind. I'll tell you what to do. Well, we better get crackin'!" He burst into laughter. "Ha-ha you get it? Kraken!? Ha-ha!"

"How do I get myself into these things..."


	3. Chapter 3

**-Kyoshi7989-**

**Leisure Activities**

**Chapter 3**

-

Tongue sticking out of the corner of his mouth, Sokka carefully modelled yet another tentacle of the super-sized Kraken. Toph dully scooped sand and through it across the mound of dirt.

"Hey," she said loudly, "we better win, or I swear, you're gonna regret it."

"Shh!" Sokka hissed out of the corner of his mouth, unable to spare a glance away from his 'masterpiece.' "Be quiet! We have to act…couple-y!"

"You wish," Toph snorted, crossing her arms and abandoning the Kraken for Sokka's hand. "Hem, I mean, you wish, darling."

"Of course, honey bun," Sokka shot back. "Would you like to help me with this, sweetie pie?"

Toph considered it. "Nah," she yawned, smirking. "I think I'll just sit here, maybe ask the waiter for a smoothie, you know, that kinda stuff. That's alright with you, isn't it, dear?"

Sokka ground his teeth. But suddenly…oh, yes! The perfect comeback! He didn't care if she was beautiful, bossy, and his only chance for a social life—it was pay back time. "Oh, snuggly-puss," Sokka cooed as loudly as he could, to which Toph choked on air, "Are you upset because we didn't make love last night, like you wanted? Don't worry, my crumbly cookie, tonight, all your desires will be sated!"

Toph was torn between gaping or gagging. "Making love? No one calls it making love anymore, except maybe my grandmother! It's having sex, or sleeping together, or shagging, or even bedding, okay?! Just no"—she shuddered—"love making."

A hotel employee walked up to them. "Excuse me," he said cautiously. "Is something wrong?

"No, no, nothing's wrong," Sokka waved him away, sounding as if something very much was. Toph smacked herself across the forehead as he continued, "My little butter ball is just having some issues with the Kraken. She just can't get crackin' on it," Sokka giggled to himself, as his companion wondered just how many times you could tell the same joke (she'd already decided that once was enough).

The terrified man smiled weakly. "How hilarious, Sir."

"Thank you," Sokka smiled. "At least someone appreciates my magnificent sense of humor!"

Toph snorted. "And who would that be, Mr. 'I'm About to Piss my Pants?'"

Sokka glowered. "He liked my joke! Didn't you, Mr...Hotel...Employee..." he trailed off, blinking, to discover that said worker had run for his life. "Huh," he mused, "Musta had something important to do."

"Oh, yeah, 'cause it's not like we scared him to death or anything, the wimp." Toph threw a handful of sand up into the air, and Sokka spit out the clump that flew straight in his mouth.

"Well..." he drawled, "My manliness can be pretty terrifying. Poor, insignificant creature. As if he'll ever live up to my level of strength and power..."

Toph laughed. "You? Manly? As if. Brittney Spears is manlier then you."

"Actually, I kinda expected that," he shrugged. "Without hair, she just looks...weird."

"Oh, yeah, the weirdest."

"Glad you agree with me—" Sokka's triumphant smile dropped to a frown. "…Humph. Meanie."

He received a snigger in reply. "Wow, great insult—"

"Excuse me!" All heads—except, of course, Toph's—turned to face the head employee as he called for attention. "The judges will be coming around in five minutes. Winners will advance to the next round...and have a chance to win the Triple Beach Crown Challenge!"

"Arrgh!" Sokka panicked, and began frantically moulding the Kraken once more. "Come on, help me! Where do you think I should put the eyes?! Quick!"

"I think you should put them right...here," Toph smirked deliciously, giving the Kraken an oblivious pat on the ass. "Definitely."

"But that's his—" Sokka stared at her flatly as realization sank in. "I hate it when you do that."

"You're the one that keeps forgetting." Plopping back onto the sand, Toph stared sightlessly up at the sky. "Now get to work, slave boy. I wanna win this thing."

Grumbling to himself, Sokka hastily pieced together the last few pieces of the monstrous sand creation. Just in time, he scratched the eyes in, and sat back to wait for the judges.

The other contestants had created some...interesting sculptures, to say the least. A sweet smiling, pony tailed girl and a man in a wheel chair had created what looked like a crazy designed castle in the clouds. And the couple to their left, a dark haired man and a pale, raven haired woman had designed a sword hanging over a corpse, and the words "we will CRUSH you" written in the sand.

Sokka was scared. Very, very scared.

"Ask him," Toph directed, as the judge walked up to her with an inquiry as to what their sand...thing was actually supposed to be. "I can keep all his sick fantasies straight."

The judge stared at her, and turned to face Sokka. "Sir...?"

"It's a Kraken," Sokka explained.

"And that would be...?" he asked plainly, scribbling down on his clipboard.

A sweat bead dropped from Sokka's forehead. "A squid…octopus…monster...thing...?"

"That's good enough for me." Giving Sokka a polite smile, the judge marched away, back to the table to converse with the other unfortunate employees picked to engage in the contest.

"We're doomed," Toph sighed.

"Well, maybe—" Sokka began, and caught a glimpse of a judge sending a 'cRaZy' hand gesture his way. "Okay, yeah. We're doomed."

"Yep."

"The doomdiest there are."

"Uh-huh."

"We might as well rename it 'The Doomsday of Sokka Kuruk and Toph Bei Fong'—"

"May I have your attention please!" All heads—with the exception of Toph's—swivelled to face the contest runner as the judges conversing ended. "We have an unprecedented judging of five winners! The couples now with a possibility of winning the Triple Beach Crown Challenge are...Teo and Song, Jin and Hahn, Ty Lee and Aang, aaaaaaaang...Toph and Sokka!"

"Yes! I knew you'd never let us down, Kracky!" Sokka cried, caressing the great sand beast lovingly.

Toph wished she knew how to roll her eyes, but settled with a low snigger instead. "Yeah, cracky is right."

A judge leaned over to whisper in the announcer's ear, and he blinked. "Attention! We are now ready to announce the next round. In order to advance to Round Three, the final chance to win the competition, the next challenge will be a...surfing contest!"

"Whoo hoo! Oh yeah! We will cream you!" Sokka screeched to the smug couple, and the creators of the infamous 'we CRUSH you' design.

The woman stalked over with her boyfriend loping close behind, an identical smirk toying at their lips. "Oh, really? We—Azula Roku and Jet Feng, by the way—have been training for this competition for six months. I highly doubt that two rookies like you will be able to beat out my boyfriend and I for the prize."

"Then I guess you're in for a surprise!" Sokka crossed his arms, and gave the two a poorly executed Evil Eye. "Isn't that right, Toph?" No one answered. "Toph?"

All eyes fixed on the woman in question, knees pulled to her chest and face in her hands. Ever so slowly, Toph's head rose to stare blankly ahead. "Sokka, I don't do surfing," she croaked hoarsely.

"But—but—we have to cream them like mash potatoes!" Sokka sputtered, pointing to Jet and Azula. "They're going to win if we don't stop them!"

Toph's upper lip curled. "Is that what they told you, really?"

"Yeah," Jet shrugged, speaking up for the first time, "But I don't suppose you'd knowing, being the terrified little girl that you are."

"What?!" said "little girl" shrieked, leaping up in indignation. After a moment to regain her composure, Toph worked a sneer. "Ha! Me, scared? As if." she renounced haughtily. "It's you who should be scared of us."

"Really? We look forward to it," Azula purred, golden eyes narrowed threateningly. "Come on, Jet," she ordered, linking arms. "We have some stunts to choreographer."

"So do we!" Sokka called after them. "Lot's of stunts. Okay, so, Toph, what do you think we should—" He turned to face his partner, and blinked at the sight of the normally unyielding woman once again curled up in the sand. "Toph? What is it?"

Ignoring his question, Toph simply moaned and dropped her head in her hands once more. "Oh my god, surfing..." Staring sightlessly up at him, Toph hissed between clenched teeth, "Doofus! What the fuck have you done?!"

* * *

Note: Toph's really freaked here, 'cause, you know, she sucks at swimming and drowning is just no fun XD But if you think it's OOC for her, I'll change it. So...whadd'ya think?


End file.
